god damn it

Well, my friends, the other ball has, as they say, dropped.

After dealing with most of the seasons of Will and Grace, Hercules, Roswell, Michael Jackson music videos, Christina Aguilera music videos, and, not least of all, WWF every monday, I thought I was home free. I honestly thought I could get through the rest of the year without having some horrid show inhabiting my airspace.

But then.....

I wish to take you back, all the way back, to about 25 minutes ago.

It's a lovely, gray Friday, the type that requires Beethoven and some form of literature. I am fulfilling both of these requirements when I hear the punching of the code on the door, and it swings open.

"Mr. Goodman!"

Oh shit. He never says that unless he knows he's about to put me through hell.

"Guess what came in the mail today!" he squeals, turning on the television.

At this point I'm already setting up my noose, but I provide a guess. "Something to do with TV."

Now, I must tell you, I honestly thought I was home free. I really did. I dealt with this kind of shit, with him sitting him all hours of the day watching his television shows, but for the last month or so, he's been clean. He's actually been out a good amount of time.

All of that was sucked away, though, with his last statement before I really lost faith in mankind:

"The first 6 seasons of Xena on DVD!"

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So, with a month to go, it looks like me and Lucy Lalas are going to have quite the interesting relationship. I haven't been pushed to the limit like this before - it's very likely I will explode at him and list the reasons why he should not be watching Xena warrior princess, which could go on for hours.

For now I will have to learn to deal with the following conversation:

"mm, let's go back to your place, it's more intimiate..."
"ah, sorry babe, my roommate's watching Xena."

I hope you're as excited for this endeavor as I am. The Roommate seems to be quite happy - he's just a few feet to my right, sitting in his chair, motionless, staring at the screen, where Lucy Lalas is prancing around in her prehistoric avant-garde warrior bikini, fighting the evil people (i dont know what they're called), and coming closer and closer to completely and utterly destroying my manhood.